You are so beautiful

Here's a question. Every single man I'e been with has said this line in the same exact way.
Is this some thing men a taught to say in "man school"?

Day One of Blog

Okay,

so I've decided to start a blog in an effort to help me see in black and white what's been going on in my life. So here goes.

Today I was not exactly the happiest person on earth. I was actually a little depressed. The day before my birthday is always a touchy point. I'm realising that I'm getting to a point where I feel like if I'm stagnant in life. Luckily for me, God has blessed me with some good friends. My boyfriend who understands my need to wallow but makes sure that I don't stay for too long at my exlcusive "Pity Party" lounge.

this evening, aas odd as I am...and no relax, I'm not insane. I spoke to a person in the Jehovah Witness faith. It was good to discuss with someone who had a knowledge of the bible what was going on. although i hae no plans on becoming a member, I thought, why not use this as an opportunity to learn and grow. Prove all things first...right?
The way I see it, God put everyone here for a reason and everyone is a teacher in some way shape or form...even if they hurt us. a perfect example of this for me was a certain person who shall remain nameless. very much Christian who observed his sabbath, didn't drink, smoke, eat shell fish....etc. although he did break down rarely and eat bacon..(oops sorry dude, the secrets out).. Broke my heart like no one ever has. Why?....I still don't quite get it. i learnt from over a year of hurting and crying and trying to figure out why is that

Even a good man can break your heart. and figuring out hte how and why won't do much good. And sometimes, too much chemistry is a bad thing. I used to think....hmmm...maybe I was too easy...or maybe he just wanted a Good SDA girl....and although I am a good girl for the most part, I'm definitley not an SDA. but enough of those thoughts. Strange that it's been over 2 years and although I'm not sad or brought to tears anymore that I still think about him and about what happened.

But anyway, back to the present, My current boyfriend who I probably never would have seen myself with for that long has annoyed me of course...but in a year and a half, I have not been hurt by him...but then again, I'm aware that am a lot more cautious with my little ticky tocker.
I'm lucky to have met Pat. Although, he has his money issues as I have mine. (I like ot be taken etc. and my man has 2 problems, no money and a job that barely covers his bills). but what he gives me is his friendship which what I need most.

At some point, I'm going to have to learn to be more affectionate with him. Maybe that's something we'll bring up. Workign on being affectionate with each other. That is a work inprogress for us since neither of us grew up in affectionate families.
Anyway, enough babbling for tonight. If you read this, more power to you.

the ramblings of a young woman finding her way through life